Hello, world

I call my mom every night. Well, mostly every night. I like to listen to her voice before I go to bed, it makes me feel less far away. It also helps me cope with the fear. The worst fear.

The first thing I noticed when I first arrived in Buenos Aires was the cats. There are cats everywhere! It is very soothing. Cats look at you like they know everything about you or maybe I like to believe they do. I know. I am fooling myself. But I need to believe someone knows me in this city. I need to believe someone knows I am too far. So, it might as well be a cat, right? Because who wants to listen to you talk about how much this place isn't your place? Or how much this house isn't your house? Or that home is a fucked up hellhole you call Tropical Dystopia? No one wants to listen to that. It's like when an acquaintance asks you, "Hey, how are you?" But they don't really care to know how you are. And, frankly, you don't want to let them know either. So, you just smile and say, "Good." And keep walking. And walking away. From people who aren't important to you. From places that aren't home no matter how much you wish they were. From fear. The worst fear.

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